Are you not happy as a mom? I cannot fix it for you, but I will guide you through what changed me, my mindset about how to be a happy stay at home mom.
I’ll be honest (and I think most moms would admit this if they are also honest) – there have been many days gone by where I have regretted becoming a mother. I just was not happy as a mom. I thought, if this is what being a mom entails, I need a way to escape.
This Post is apart of the Learn to Be Content Series – In this post, I speak to the satisfaction of being a mom.
Disclaimer: This post does not cover every reason for mom unhappiness. One obvious problem early in motherhood could be post-partum depression. See my legal page as to why I do not speak to that. If you suspect you are dealing with a bigger issue than addressed in this post, seek out a medical professional.
But of course, we can’t change the past and I didn’t want to wish my children away either. I’m not much of a dreamer, except when it comes to business, and yet even in my matter-of-fact personality, I found it hard to be happy as a stay at home mom.
I should have resigned myself to be satisfied with this new reality.
Just the facts and the desire to be a good mother, to give my kids the childhood I did not have was not, enough to move me to a place of contentment, and certainly not to happiness.
I have wondered
what is wrong with me, why is it so hard for me to be happy as a mom?
Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.
indeed, you were concerned before, but you lacked opportunity.
He will provide what we will need to manage what He places in our lives. The One that created us is the same One that will enable us. Enable us to mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically handle motherhood.
There will be times when we just don’t know what to do and that is the perfect time to go back to our Provision and ask Him what to do.
Ask Him how, what, when, why and where. Be specific and keep going back to Him.
Seriously, being content is finding your sufficiency in Him, not in yourself. The discontentment you feel as a mom is due to trying to find your sufficiency either in yourself or the life you feel you can make for yourself apart from children. But they are there! You know you love them, even if it isn’t a touchy-feely, they are always lovable, type of way. You cannot make a life apart from them and honestly you cannot make life the way you’d like for it to be.
You can try to make a wonderful life with many options, travel, sports, hobbies, education.
Read more in my post about finding yourself again and doing something with your momlife! How to be motivated when you just aren’t.
The most important education you can give yourself is to learn contentment by knowing He is our Provision and He will provide all you need to do what He’s given you to do. This is how to be happy.
Paul’s mission was very great and trying. Most of us will never have to endure the challenges he had before him and yet he was satisfied in plenty and in lack because he found consistency in God’s care.
This is a tricky one. Yes, some of it we just have to figure out for ourselves over time -that contentment of which Paul writes and that you reference. Some of it (for some of us) traces to postpartum depression or other mental illness, though – I’ve watched several friends struggle, and this kind of “dissatisfaction” with “mom life” can’t just be prayed away or wished away, but only really gets better with professional counseling.
I really needed this today. I’m actually writing about how the little things can make us happy, if only we let them, so it tied into how I’ve been feeling lately. Thank you for sharing.
Nice thoughts on being content. Good advice!