Stay at home mom motivation comes and goes depending on the number of tantrums you have to endure. It’s understandable how you could get discouraged and lose your sense of purpose. So if you feel your cup of care is low, this is how to feel fulfilled as a stay at home mom.
How do Stay at Home Moms Stay Sane?
When I first became a stay at home mom I remember both my mom and aunt thinking, 1 – I had gone insane, why would I give up my career to sit at home. They honestly thought I could never feel fulfilled as a stay at home mom. However, they missed the whole point of me raising an individual, precious soul to benefit society and become a soldier for the Lord.
But, 2, they thought I wouldn’t last long as a stay at home mom because of my intellect and passion for life. And yet, here we are 11 years later, me still at home.
Although now, I do work from home and homeschool I’m still considered by many as a stay at home mom. But I have to admit, I did almost give up a few times before my son was preschool-aged. Those long days of diaper after diaper and Dora after Dora was quite enough to drive a mom insane.
So how does a stay at home mom stay sane? Well, I do have a whole post dedicated to stay at home mom boredom, but since this post is about how to feel fulfilled as a stay at home mom I figure I should give some tips.
Stay at Home Moms can Beat Boredom by
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Getting God into Your Life
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Building a Network of Friends
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Getting out of the House
How to be Happy as a Stay at Home Mom
Solving boredom doesn’t necessarily give fulfillment in the stay at home mom lifestyle. Battling crazy kids and their constant needs can wear on ya. We love our children but they are so much work, especially if you are going it alone. Motherhood is just overall hard (I mean, yeah also for dads but this site isn’t about that).
Moms are juggling to-dos and dishes, running to the store and staying up at night. And guys, I am the first to say that I cried more than one time while rocking babies to sleep at 1:30am. I just wanted some space and if they would sleep, I could sleep.
Mom life is not for wimps.
A firm hold on your sanity is a huge piece of how to feel fulfilled as a stay at home mom. You aren’t going to be happy as a stay at home mom without having some backbone, some consistency, some resolve and intention. These are some things that will build up intentionality in your life and allow you to feel fulfilled as a mom at home.
Getting Dressed
Every day get up and get dressed. I know some days you won’t be leaving home and some days baby will spit up on your a few times. That’s okay. Mentally, getting ready for the day will allow your brain to function in a more normal pathway than if you go several days wearing sleepwear. Refresh yourself as much as possible with a shower too.
Goals and God
You’ve gotta start with God. Fulfillment is so much tied to purpose (as we’ll cover below), that if you don’t have a focus for your life, and you don’t see purpose, you will feel utterly unfulfilled.
You won’t have anything to fill your cup if all you see is the baby’s needs and your own wants.
Ask the Lord to give you goals for your life and then shoot for them, even if it’s slow it will be worth it. Goals could be anywhere from cleaning the sink to getting your graduate’s degree. If you need more ideas for goals, read Life Organization 101.
Planning Each Day
As you start to form goals you will need to create a plan to achieve them. Getting things accomplished each day will 100% give you satisfaction in your life.
Planners are the best method for setting up routines, schedules, knowing which events are when and of course your daily to-dos which will allow you to accomplish your goals in time. Never been a planner person? No problem, here is How to Organize Your Life with a Planner.
Go Outside
You will feel tons better about your life at home if you aren’t there 24/7. It’s a balance, however. You can’t be gone all of the time either. For my introverted heart, getting out 2 to 3 days during the work-week was quite adequate until my kids were school-aged.
If you are having some real struggles with being home with the baby I’d recommend leaving the house every day for a short amount of time (maybe an hour or hour and a half).
And when you go out of the house please make sure to spend some time outside. Being outside, not just out of the house, will allow you to breathe fresh air and take in nature. It is very grounding and will give you a new vibrancy.
Being Social
When you go out, be social. Remember the things I said were super helpful to me not being bored at home. Well yes, building a network of friends and just overall talking to other adults will make your time at home even more full.
Hobbies
Start a hobby. Doing something other than kids all day will mean more than you think. It’s hard to figure out a hobby you can work around the kids but it will be worth it. I am working on a post to add here about hobbies for moms at home.
No Perfection
Here’s the thing, social media intentionally displays everything as picture-worthy, and desirable as possible. So much of social media, yes, even Pinterest, is for advertisement and sales. So, of course, they will make it look good.
Friends and family online, of course, want to show you the best things. So most of what you see will seem perfect but that’s not your life because you aren’t a photo, you and your kids are real.
You will feel much more fulfilled if you don’t constantly look at your phone and the beautiful lives others seem to life. They aren’t, that’s just what they are showing you. Trust me, their kids peed on themselves in the store checkout line too. Are you a perfectionist? I have some tips to help you deal with perfectionism in motherhood.
How can a Stay at Home Mom be Content?
Finding purpose as a stay at home mom will lead you down the road of contentment. This blog has a few posts on motherhood purpose for a stay at home mom who is lacking motivation.
You’ve got to stop and think, why am I doing all of this? Is it because I have to? No. No mom has to be a good mom. You are doing it because you want to. But why? Why do you want to be a good mom, ultimately? Why do you want to be a mom at home?
You will feel fulfilled as a stay at home mom if you will simply see that you are being mom for a greater purpose than just being a good mom, than just because you think you need to be. You are also raising individual souls who are relying on you. This is more important than a paycheck or even than self-fulfillment in a career.
Crazy enough, you will get self-fulfillment by serving your family and your kids. Disciplining, relating, comforting them in the day-to-day trials they will have to endure.
You are their backbone until they grow one.
You love them and want to be there, strengthening your family. Most times this calling is not glamorous and probably makes you regret your decision, but it’s still what you feel called to do. We just have to learn to be content when things are hard, and grateful when things are easy.
You may want to check out my whole series on contentment, if this is an issue for you.
How can I Keep my Mind Sharp as a Stay at Home Mom?
It may be pretty obvious but feeling fulfilled as a stay at home mom has to do with how you think about yourself and your daily life. I mean really, motivation, sanity, happiness all center around how you think, not really about what is happening.
So to be a successful stay at home mom you’ve gotta keep your mind sharp. Some ways to do this would be to:
Pray for Clarity.
Taking your petitions to God will keep worries at bay.
Read More.
Videos are entertaining but they don’t get your mind working like reading, especially books where you will be forced to focus.
Practice Focusing.
Doing longer games and mental activities will help. Games that make you think are helpful like Soduko, Crossword puzzles, and any other logic or memory games. Any other activities that stimulate your brain like learning a new skill or building your vocabulary will work.
Clear Your Mind.
You need not just clarity on what’s going on but also the clearance of those things. Clearing your mind of all of the to-dos is actually good for you to keep things sharp. Journaling is one method of doing this.
Could it Be Stay at Home Mom Depression?
Women who wonder how to feel fulfilled as a stay at home mom, sometimes are dealing with deeper mental issues. Baby blues can be apart of it, if you’ve just had a baby in the last 6 months, but it could be more serious. If you aren’t feeling fulfilled at home and none of these above tactics are working you may be dealing with depression.
Don’t doubt that you have postpartum depression, especially if nothing really changes your down mood from day to day and week to week. Post-partum depression can extend beyond the first few months or the first year after the birth of your baby. Stay at home mom depression is something that is real and should be investigated.
If you aren’t sure you have depression or not, it’s still good to do a bit of research, reach out to your ob or midwife, or call for more information from the Mental Health Services.
The Truth about How to Feel Fulfilled as a Stay at Home Mom
Knowing how to feel fulfilled as a mom at home comes down to you. This stay at home mom life is about the effort you put into it and making it work. The fulfillment comes from knowing your purpose and making this life your own!
If you aren’t sure if you are getting all there is out of being at home, you might want to read the Absolutely Everything Guide to How to Be a Stay at Home Mom.
